Wednesday, August 30, 2006

Forget Diet, Exercise, and Pills


Sheila and Jonas
Originally uploaded by katzeye.
Forget Diets, Exercise and Pills!

This is the new era of cyberspace! We shop online, we communicate online, we send files online. There is virtually no need to ever go anywhere anymore! We can just stay home and utilize our windows to the universe for all of our needs, including the need to shed a few pounds and look MAH-volous!

A recent “news” item is all about how Katie Couric shed 20 pounds thanks to modern technology. Yep. Apparently an enthused photo editor thought she could use some slimming and so he used his mouse, and voila! 20 pounds gone, just like that! Who would ever know? I certainly will never see her in person, will you?

Let’s see, if I just never go out in public, and why would I need to, other than to get groceries and work out, I could just maintain a certain look, via software. I can get my groceries online, and if there is no need to work out, why should I?

Of course, her response to the controversy (and to me, the controversy is, and ought to be, how far should photo editors go to alter images? But that is an entirely other topic), was that she liked the original photo better because there was “more of me to love!” Hmm…imagine being narcissistic enough to…well, never mind, that is also a different topic. It’s just that my irony alarms seem to be going off here.

So, we no longer need to worry about such things as love handles or double chins, because they can be removed in seconds thanks to modern photo editing software.

Okay.

(I am wondering if there is any kind of elongating tool, I have always wanted to be around 5’7” to 5’8”, I’d only need 2-3 inches added.)

PS-I used this photo of my grandson and my sister, who is about an inch or two taller than me and in no need of digital lipo-suction because that way no one could accuse me of altering the photo, or of using someone in need of alteration.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

The "magic" of Hollywood is nothing new. I remember, as a kid, seeing a demonstration of how makeup was used in Liz Taylor photos to make her neck look more slender.

If the truth be told, Wolf Blitzer is actually a girl. Thanks to a morph genius at CNN, Wolf is how we see him now.

Mark -- Phoenix, AZ

Morgan said...

Heeee, I was just thinking about how often we see celebrities in all their glory in photo shoots that they have control over and they look like they are just perfection in a way that none of us real people could ever manage and then, we see photos by paparazis where they are schleping off to get their starbucks and their tummy is hanging over their waistband and their hair looks like a birdsnest and they look like US!

jenni p. said...

I say we all just sit around, watch reality tv all the time, eat whatever we want, and alter our public personas to suit the occasion on those few times when we really have to go out in public, and just avoid that as much as possible. sound like a perfect world to me! I'm going to the freezer now for some ben & jerry's and then back to the computer to reduce my midsection in the photos i am sending to the dating website.